They choose games, books or movies that cause fear in them. Moreover, they behave like this, as if they enjoyed feeling the fear. And not just boys – girls love thrillers too, provided, that end well. Because the psyche of children is still very immature, they survive, for no apparent reason, different fears, which they cannot name and control. And fairy tales or games, in which there is "the bad one” allow them to get used to fear.
The victory of good over evil.
Listening to a fairy tale about dramatic events and violent feelings, the child finds out, that there is nothing unnatural about it, that she experiences the same emotions. He identifies with the protagonist, who manages to defeat the wrongdoers, and also thanks to him he finds out, how to deal with fear. In a fairy tale, good wins, so she teaches, that evil does not pay. Even if for a while the evil takes over and the hero suffers, it all turns to his advantage in the end, and the victory brings satisfaction to the little listener too. Getting used to negative emotions is all the easier, that it takes place in the self-confident presence of parents.
We used to love fairy tales when we were little – about the Little Red Riding Hood, Hansel and Gretel, Cinderella, Snow White. Today, as we read them to our children, sometimes our hair stands up in terror, how much cruelty and ruthlessness with which both their hero is treated, and his persecutor, when he is finally defeated. We would even like to omit some passages, but the child even demands them. Usually, it makes us read the same stories many times, which he already knows by heart. She listens with bated breath. To, which we find terrible, it doesn't bother him at all. Moreover, after the fairy tale is over, the toddler is usually calm and cheerful, falls asleep in a good mood. This is repeatability and certainty, that the story ends well each time, gives him a sense of peace, calms fear.
Fear gives courage.
Children like fairy tales, because they are about serious matters: love, friendship and hope, but also about hate, jealousy, fear and despair. They talk about these feelings in an understandable way, clearly separating right from wrong and showing, that even someone, who feels small and weak, has a chance of success and happiness in life. The action of the fairy tales takes place in fictional ones, imaginary circumstances: long ago, behind the mountains, behind the forests. So our little ones know, that the evil witch exists only in this enchanted land and is not lurking somewhere near their home.
The fairy tales talk about it, that the world is not always friendly and joyful. My, adults know it very well and we would like to protect the child from the failures of life for as long as possible. However, we will not protect it completely – better, to be prepared for it as soon as possible, that they may be faced with unpleasantness – For example, on the part of its peers, Bajka fulfills this role perfectly. pointing, that besides good people there are also bad people. It teaches caution, but also courage. Since the hero coped with the "villains” it means, that it is possible.
Horror with humor.
Here's a thrill: the old bear is fast asleep, suddenly wakes up. breaks off and catches up with the victim, to eat her. The children are screeching, cover their mouths, they crouch, so as not to get caught. Then they laugh out loud. For a moment they believed, that they have a real bear in front of them, they were really afraid. This particular one, fear that comes from a specific source is better than an incomprehensible fear, which overwhelms them sometimes. And the most important thing, that after a while you can stop being afraid, because there was no real bear here. Other games play a similar role, e.g.. "Gąski, goose home”, or "There is walking by the road”. A little fear is something, which adds flavor to life, provided, that this state does not last long and we manage to regain a sense of security.
Be careful with the TV.
Unfortunately, TV is full of movies ,,for children”, also drawing, which not only do not benefit, but they can even harm. To te, where aggression is the main theme. There is no point in watching them – the child cannot find the hero, with whom he could identify, nor is he able to feel the suffering caused solely by physical violence. When we turn on the TV, we usually leave them alone. This is a big mistake. The child will manage to tame fear only then, when he feels protected by the presence of his mom or dad.
Emergency signal.
It happens, that the child experiences prolonged and persistent fears, which he cannot cope with, e.g.. I don't want to stay in peace alone, in which the light was turned off, at night she comes to her parents' bedroom. This behavior is a sign for adults – you may need to consult a psychologist.